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Why do I do these things?
Feb. 27th, 2005 03:02 amPursue long distance romantic interests, that is.
After the last time, and how badly I got burned by her... you'd think I'd have learned by now that distance might not be the best idea.
But I guess I'm a slow learner. Because here I am, doing it again. Heh :)
I mean, it's just kinda snuck up on me. A little playful flirting, a question about the intent behind something... and then revelation of some mutual interest.
And it doesn't help that I have two cats and a phoenix egging me on.
But... what can I say? She's an amazing woman (even if she does have her flaws). We have a lot in common, and a lot of shared interests. She makes me smile, and laugh. She beat me at an impromptu punning contest... four times over! She sees me for who I am, not for who I appear to be, which is how so many people like to... no, insist on seeing me. She shares many of my values - including very clear and open communication. I keep asking her questions about what's going on. And instead of getting annoyed, as many do... she THANKS me for it. She's not perfect, but nobody is. She's wonderful though.
So yeah. I thought I was going to swear off long distance. And yet here I am, doing it again.
And feeling strangely confident - and utterly terrified.
Terrified for all the usual reasons. I'm not good enough, she's going to realize I'm a loser, I'm going to push her too far and turn her off... and I'm still not sure why she likes me.
But I'm confident too. I'm getting a good feeling from her. She's at least as nervous about this as I am. And, well... she who is always right seems to think this is a good move... and she knows us both quite well, and we both trust her judgement.
I don't know, I'm rambling. I'm nervous and scared and excited and happy.
There are about 4 of you who know who I'm talking about. And 2 more who would recognize her if I named her.
And you're reading this too, most likely. Which also makes me nervous.
The rest of you wouldn't know or recognize her, so it doesn't matter.
OK, enough rambling. Bedtime.
And to those four... I'M NOT TWITTERPATED, DAMMIT. Not yet, at least.
*looks at the song playing*
OK, now that's just eerie. On a few levels.
After the last time, and how badly I got burned by her... you'd think I'd have learned by now that distance might not be the best idea.
But I guess I'm a slow learner. Because here I am, doing it again. Heh :)
I mean, it's just kinda snuck up on me. A little playful flirting, a question about the intent behind something... and then revelation of some mutual interest.
And it doesn't help that I have two cats and a phoenix egging me on.
But... what can I say? She's an amazing woman (even if she does have her flaws). We have a lot in common, and a lot of shared interests. She makes me smile, and laugh. She beat me at an impromptu punning contest... four times over! She sees me for who I am, not for who I appear to be, which is how so many people like to... no, insist on seeing me. She shares many of my values - including very clear and open communication. I keep asking her questions about what's going on. And instead of getting annoyed, as many do... she THANKS me for it. She's not perfect, but nobody is. She's wonderful though.
So yeah. I thought I was going to swear off long distance. And yet here I am, doing it again.
And feeling strangely confident - and utterly terrified.
Terrified for all the usual reasons. I'm not good enough, she's going to realize I'm a loser, I'm going to push her too far and turn her off... and I'm still not sure why she likes me.
But I'm confident too. I'm getting a good feeling from her. She's at least as nervous about this as I am. And, well... she who is always right seems to think this is a good move... and she knows us both quite well, and we both trust her judgement.
I don't know, I'm rambling. I'm nervous and scared and excited and happy.
There are about 4 of you who know who I'm talking about. And 2 more who would recognize her if I named her.
And you're reading this too, most likely. Which also makes me nervous.
The rest of you wouldn't know or recognize her, so it doesn't matter.
OK, enough rambling. Bedtime.
And to those four... I'M NOT TWITTERPATED, DAMMIT. Not yet, at least.
*looks at the song playing*
OK, now that's just eerie. On a few levels.
